STUCK IN MAH HEAD GET IT OUT

I am sitting
In the morning
At the diner
On the corner
I am waiting
At the counter
For the man
To pour the coffee
And he fills it
Only halfway
And before
I even argue
He is looking
Out the window
At somebody
Coming in

"It is always
Nice to see you"
Says the man
Behind the counter
To the woman
Who has come in
She is shaking
Her umbrella
And I look
The other way
As they are kissing
Their hellos
I'm pretending
Not to see them
Instead
I pour the milk

I open
Up the paper
There's a story
Of an actor
Who had died
While he was drinking
It was no one
I had heard of
And I'm turning
To the horoscope
And looking
For the funnies
When I'm feeling
Someone watching me
And so
I raise my head

There's a woman
On the outside
Looking inside
Does she see me?
No she does not
Really see me
Cause she sees
Her own reflection
And I'm trying
Not to notice
That she's hitching
Up her skirt
And while she's
Straightening her stockings
Her hair
Is getting wet

Oh, this rain
It will continue
Through the morning
As I'm listening
To the bells
Of the cathedral
I am thinking
Of your voice ...

BLEH

bleh i say!

i got written up tonight
which was theeeeeee most.ridiculous.thing.ever.

i was scooted all the way up to the wall dividing J's cubie from mine, talking to him
i would turn away when he would get a call

"someone" (ugh drama) supposedly saw he and i talking while he was on a call.
i got pulled aside and given a write up.
so ridiculous.
even my UM who gave me the writeup even told me she didn't believe i was doing it
but "somebody" complained and so it had to be acted on.
we don't even have files anymore they're sent back to company B's headquarters already
all that shit goes away when company A takes over.

crazy shit batman
they're getting all kinds of anal in the last days of company B
and it seems that likely it will be all crazy anal for a while after company A is in.

then mike and i got into it on the floor
i'm surprised i didn't get written up for THAT.

i ALMOST made it all the way to the changeover without ever getting written up for anything
never thought this would be a problem.

i'm a great employee, damnit. crazy shit.


i may be naive but i am a good employee, i don't believe i do anything termination worthy
i'm quite proud of being very good at my job.
so i don't think i have anything to worry about
it's worrysome that i got a writeup for something i don't believe i did.
but, *knock on wood* only got until the 28th till everything goes back to clean slate
and that's only one writeup
i think they'd have to be grasping at straws or out to get me to get me terminated.

annoying still.

and yet, despite it all
i still go to bed all contented.
heeee

hmmmmmm

i just read thru a bunch of posts novemberish thru octoberish of 2001

here's some very cute pictures

the part i read thru was after spanky moved out and kal lost his job.
wow, maybe i was happy before that?
just reading thru and noticing that my moods were absolutly dependant on that mexican guy
i seemed to only be happy when he was there on weekends.
why didn't anyone point out what a dependant stupid i was being?

some anon replied to a post around that time which is what got me wandering thru the past again
that would be this post

i'm again struck by the fact it seems i'm funny and more interesting when things are suck.
odd.

wow ... yeah... i'm much happier taking care of my self
neermind how good or bad i am at it.
i am independant.