a lot of nothing

[hoveringsombrero]

didn't get much of anything accomplished today but we tried.

got an advert in the paper about a place selling cars for cheap.
went down there and it was officially confirmed that i have NO CREDIT, none at all
this is very odd.
we were directed to a buyherepayhere which has a pretty nice deal, but we don't have the 3-5 for a down payment.

it was worth a look-into

my car is making odd noises and i don't know what to do if it dies.

probably get a bus pass for the peanut guy so he can try to find some work.

*sigh*
right now feels like nobody gives half a shit except for curtis. J is avoidant, i'm sure there'll be nice little pat excuses when he does contact us.
seems we don't even warrant being told his new cell phone number, better for him to avoid us i guess.
we're down to just my cell phone and coming into the office to use the computer. we sent him the title to peanut's car and haven't heard from him since.
he was gone last weekend for the anniversary with the girl he is still muddling along with. he claims his job pays well, but he coudln't even be bothered with $18 to send us a computer he's not even using. perhaps he got girl that shiny rock she was begging for. *shrug*

i'm sure i'll soon get contacted with a story about how busy he is at work, or there's family problems, or some tragedy in his or the girl's family, and i'll feel like a shit and apologize, SOP motherfucker.

it has been mentioned to me that perhaps i should ask online friends for help with our bills and lack of food.
refer to the above nobody gives a shit statement. yeah.
the only people that do care, are worse off than we are.
i'm getting a tiny cheque on the 25th ,and then i don't get paid till the day before the wedding is planned to happen.
so yeah, all my sureness that i could afford everything just fine ... yeah.

essentially this is a big fuck off.
don't give a shit about us, then don't pretend to be my friend.
this probably applies to nobody that reads me on a regular basis, i'm mostly annoyed at a couple people who probably won't even read this or won't till much later.

i'm not even sure what i'm trying to say anymore
it's not even a mad that nobody helped issue. it's an upset that nobody even cared. which is probably moot since i try to pretend everything's fine and dandy so nobody knows anyway

talked myself in a circle i did
are you still reading? wow. i probably wouldn't be.

again it's moot, we'll get by, we always do.
and that's probably why nobody cares.
ignore me and i figure it out.
yeah, real sweet of ya.
i'm annoyed in general.
i have no point anymore but i just keep typing

as usual the people i don't mind offending won't give a shit
the people i don't want to offend will think it's about them and get offended

AHHHH maybe i should just erase this whole post
nope i'm a dumbass and will anyway.

here's the sticky jist
we have pretty much mac and cheese
half a tank of gas
we'll survive just fine if nobody cares.
just wish more than curtis did.

eventually we'll have a pinky out here too, maybe
she's got enough shit of her own going on that i'm not even sure she knows anything's wrong over here.

i'm going to stop typing and go back home now.
oqeihf;owaefna;wovjfdlx;c

Comments

[xhappyx.livejournal.com]

It is not that people don't give a shit, but sometimes we just have nothing left to offer to anyone anymore due to just trying to survive and get ahead ourself. I have in the past done what I can do to help out and trust me I had nothing at that time to spare either. I am sorry you are going through tough times. I wish there was something I could do but I just can't. I do however worry about you.

[eris.livejournal.com]

yeah i know, i tried to point out an exception for people who were worse off than me.
don't take any of it personal i'm frustrated at having to take care of everything and being the only one working right now.

i did vent, and came home to much surprise at peanut telling me people'd replied to this in a positive manner.

:D

[kendryk.livejournal.com]

I send you guys happy thoughts all the time. I wish I had a machine that would convert happy thoughts to currency though...

[eris.livejournal.com]

i do .. but it only converts them into

... wait for it ...

DIBBYDOLLARS

hahahahahhahaha
*snork*

[xhappyx.livejournal.com]

P.S. Peanut is eligible for free drugs and meds if he can not afford it. There are patient programs out there that he can apply for. I am not talking medicaid but acutal medicine free from the doctor. All you need to do is go to the free clinic and there are forms you can have them fax for him. Once the meds arrive they will call him to come pick them up. You are usually awarded the meds for a year and they come every 3 months. You need to just call every 3 months and tell them you need more once you are awarded to the program.

Go here http://www.themedicineprogram.com/ and check out that site. There are more sites if you wish to research. But basically if you can not afford medical care and need meds the drug companies have to give you a grant if you are a single person household and make under $16k a year. If you have any questions let me know. If you can let me know which insulin etc that he takes and which pharmacutical company makes it I can probably get you the forms for it from my doctor.

[m-leprae.livejournal.com]

http://www.needymeds.com is another site she can look into. It helps to print the instructions and take them to the doctor.

Some of the programs blow you off based on your previous year's income if it was above poverty level.

[projectx.livejournal.com]

I missed something..
Who's "J"?
car?
Meds?
wha??

I may not be able to send much, but e-mail me your addy, and I will see what I can do. I am kinda worse for the wear myself, but I never could see you not eat. I think I can spare $40. Not much, but something.
It may not get to you for a few days. I am working the times the post office is open, but I can send it off with the mailman at my work. If you give me an addy tomarrow, I can send it teuesday. You should have it by friday.. Depending on the post.

[eris.livejournal.com]

i emailed you at the address in your userinfo

i left out an answer to the first questions,

meds = peanut is diabetic

car = we only have one and he can't drive it plus i'm using it, plus it's making scary noises

J = the second boyfriend who dumped us after helping us move here, we've been trying to be back in friendly contact but he's got the whole girlfriend thing and seems to be also the whole avoiding us thing going on.

[dougdougdoug.livejournal.com]

I could send a PC but gee it might get stolen again ;) I have my sister's questionable PC that she isn't using cuz it reboots itself. I would have to make sure I have everything backed up and I couldn't tell you why it reboots itself, also I have no monitor to give. Is that something you could even use, a self rebooting computer with no monitor?

[eris.livejournal.com]

yeah no shit, i still owe you for that one.
the loss of it has been seriously annoying since starting training.
it would have been great to have at work.

yeah i'm sure i could part it out if nothing else, i have a working hard drive and the constantly rebooting sounds like a virus (?)

seems to be just my motherboard which is dead, and naturally the processor on as well.

i emailed my address to elise @ gaetzfamily.com if you want to try sending it.
we live in a very nice place now with an alarm system in our apartment, so we're out of the woods stealing-wise for now i believe ;)

so the processor

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

iz fried too?
lame ass
comps.

q'z been super busy
so will not be able
to talk to him till
tom., hopefully he
has something that
will be use-ful for you

sorry

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

that life sucks so bad, if i had something
to give you i would =(. what's the prob.
with your comp., perhaps i can ship
a part if that's all you need, an if q
can spare an if we have of course.
i can rumage through old parts, an
see if we have what's needed. i will
keep you guyz, an all of us in mind
an hopefully we can all get out of
this stupid vortexed hole of not
hav-ing enough for regular life.
cash flow come hether, enter
eris's life an every-one else
who iz in need. thank you.
have a good day eris an
rest of the week/month.

Re: sorry

[eris.livejournal.com]

any parts would do
here's what we have that is working

two cases with power supply
one hard drive
2 cdroms
1 floppys
3 monitors
2 sets of keyboard/mice

i can't remember what type of memory, each board has a different kind, one board may still be working but it's pretty screwed up.

my board died, and his, no matter how many reinstalls shows the same FAT and kernel errors

email me at dibbydoll@hotmail.com and either he or i will reply with address. he tends to be down here on the computer while i'm at work

Re: sorry

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

just checked my email, i'll talk to q
an see if we can help in any way.

Re: sorry

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

any parts would do
here's what we have that is working

3 Cases (two with power supply)
1 Hard Drive (possibly two)
2 CD-Roms (one is a burner)
1 Floppy Drive
3 Monitors
2 Keyboards (one normal, one split key)
3 Mice (two optical and one trackball)
3 Motherboards (one dead, one slightly miffed, one fully functional)
2 CPUs (one amd k6-2 500 mhz, one amd duron 1.2 gig)
2 RAM sticks (128 meg each, one is SDRAM, one is DDRAM)
1 Cable Modem from Cox
2 Network Cards (one PCI, one onboard)
2 Video Cards (one PCI, one onboard)
2 Sound Cards (one PCI, one onboard)
2 Modems (both PCI)
2 Sets of Speakers
All cables and wires

two of the three boards may still be working but one is pretty screwed up, while we have one that is fully functional.

my board is messed up, and hers is possibly dead, that leaves the fully functional one

email eris at dibbydoll@hotmail.com and myself at vegas.peanut@gmail.com, either she or myself will reply with address. i tend to be down here on the computer while she's at work

*cran introduces herself, an handz you a lollipop =)

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

hey peanut me are cran-girl/x-girl/re-in-ven-ted-take-#

ummm, which processor goes with her board?

Re: *cran introduces herself, an handz you a lollipop =)

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

well, her board is an amd board. she has a duron (amd duron), but we're not sure if her board, or her processor, is burnt out. i'm guessing that duron and higher go with her board. the new board she has says it supports duron, xp, and i think athlon. mine only supports amd k6-2. not sure about anything else. but as i said earlier, the new board she has came with a manual that says it supports athlon, duron, and xp.

hope that helps

oh, and thanks for the lolli
was good
;)

Re: *cran introduces herself, an handz you a lollipop =)

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

k, thanks

an you're welcome!
glad it was tasty =)

Re: *cran introduces herself, an handz you a lollipop =)

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

hee
tasted like cotton candy i think

we appreciate the help
we really do

oh, by the way, mind if i add you to my friends list?

Re: *cran introduces herself, an handz you a lollipop =)

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

yeop, cotton candy...

*cran gigglez


no prob., hope we've got something that will help
old compy parts are getting down so low now a days.

still have to ask, it's been a crazy long week.

i did make a quick comment to him about the
prob., an he mentioned that it could be bad
ram, since you guys already tried reinstalling.


an by all means pleaze do, that would be cool =)

Re: *cran introduces herself, an handz you a lollipop =)

[reinventedtake3.livejournal.com]

old compy parts, what?
i mean extra compy parts

still haven't found out if we
have something, but am
trying real real hard, k

hope you guyz are
doing well, an tell
eris i said hi an
that i hope she
had a good day

[jvtazz.livejournal.com]

You assume alot and don't know what's happening in other peoples life. Everytime the peanut tried to contact me online by the time i actually got it he was gone except recently when we talked a little bit tonight. I'm getting my own stuff fixed right now given the fact that the girlfriend and i are done so no no BIG SHINY ROCK so yeah. I have sent you money and tried to show you I care, I'm just trying to get my shit settled and ya know if the computer was gonna kill either one of you with not having it I woulda sent it with my own money which i don't really have since a couple things have bitten me in the ass recently such as my family throwing a shit about having to pay to fly me home after helping you move so i had to pay them back for that then there's also the fact that I'm not being avoidant, I'm trying not to burn your phone mins up so i'm keeping my eye out on ur LJ to see what's going on. and that's that, hope you like my "excuses"

s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

we both understand things are going on bro. she and i are just a bit peeved that we lost BOTH our computers. we're stuck having to play well with others in the rental office, if you know what i mean. it's really irritating and all. she took it the hardest though. you know she lives off that computer. since it's gone, and being stressed cause of money, and having to go to work so early in the morning, etc has made her a bit on the negative twitchy side.

she vented, and she also wrote an apology post too, or at least i think she did. anyway, don't take it too personally man. though, i mean, she did say some stuff that was directed at you passively. but still, don't take it too personally cause it was all done out of irritation at the world. i know i can't make you feel different by telling you how to run things in your life and all, but at least try and not sweat it.

we hear you have a new cell phone hey? if so, what's the number? email it to me or her. you have her email address, mine's vegas.peanut@gmail.com or just leave it in a private post to eris or myself.

Re: s'up

[jvtazz.livejournal.com]

there was nothing passive about what was written and directed at me

Re: s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

well, now that i remember most of what was said and such, you're right. it wasn't very passive. i do apologize for her. i'm sure you're used to her doing that though.

more s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

we just feel that you're avoiding us a bit, ya know? i mean, i'm sure you have shit going on in your life right now that would bar you from keeping in touch with us and all, but try and write some email or something from time to time?

just say something like, "hi, i'm still alive and thinking about you guys." or something like that. doesn't have to be a majorly big email. i'm sure you think we're avoiding you too, but i can assure you we're not, mano. i just gave up trying to talk to you cause when i did message you, i'd wait and wait for a reply, but i got nothing. not even email saying, "oh, i got your message ... blah blah blah." well, that and having the lack of phone and computer.

it's true, while we won't die if we don't get a computer, we'd still like to have one. curtis said he'd give you the money to send it out, and i think if we save and scrape hard enough, we can even send it to you. we'd just really like to have a computer ... soon. eris more than myself. i don't mind the walk to the office everyday, but she can't do it.

so, if you can, and if she can get curtis to send it to you, please dude, i'm begging you, send out that computer. it'd make our lives so much better, and easier.

Re: more s'up

[jvtazz.livejournal.com]

You guys can feel however you guys want to feel. I'm sorry i don't have time to email it's not like either of you have emailed me to see what's going on, she just starts goin off about how i'll come up with some excuses blah blah blah...why can't eris walk to the office she break her leg or something else?? i have no issue sending you guys the comp stuff i just need you guys to send me the shipping money i told you guys that awhile back i've been waiting for it and haven't gotten anything letting me know that it's there so i can ship it out so *shrug*

Re: more s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

i know man, you're right. we haven't exactly tried to keep communications open between each other, and that's our fault, not all our fault though, but our fault none the less.

yeah, she did send you a blasting about "excuses" and all that. it was pretty much directed right into your forehead, so i can't really say it was a passive thing.

well, i think she could walk to the office. not very often though. that'd take some time. you know her back is. if she's up and walking around for a long time, it starts to hurt, then she gets irritable and cranky and all that. that's why she doesn't walk to the office. it's her back, and i think her ankles and legs swell up too.

i know you're still waiting for the money. we'll talk to curtis to see if he can get it to you. can you tell us how much it will be? just round up to the nearest whole ten dollar amount, for example, if it were $18 just say it's $20, or if it's $11 then say it's $20. ya know? we'll try and get it out to you via paypal or on your credit card as soon as we can.

even more s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

oh, by the way, i'm sorry to hear about you and "the girl" and i'm also glad to hear about it. it was time, i think. i think you'll be happier now, and not have to worry about playing the "cat and mouse" game with her anymore. we both know what i mean. *wink*

i'm not writing this to give you a hard time, bro. i promise. just letting you know that things here are going as best as they can, and that we'd like you to keep in touch with us. we're not harboring any ill feelings towards you dude. things happened, feelings were hurt, and forgiveness has been given. at least, i've forgiven. i don't know about you or she.

*sigh*

anyway guy, take care out there in california. we'd like to have you out here, but you seem to not want to come out here because you're afraid you'll "mess what we have up" or something like that. you wouldn't. you just have to learn to be more "poly" as eris would say. but enough of the past dredging.

drop us some email, call eris, write us a letter in your spare time at work. don't be afraid to keep in touch.

ok dude, they have to shut down the system to put in a new modem. talk to you later.

peace out, mano

Re: even more s'up

[jvtazz.livejournal.com]

Let's be honest you're not sorry to hear about me and the girl not really, you're just trying to be nice, of which i'm grateful, but again don't say it unless you mean it.
i will be who i am no more no less. I am not poly enough for the situation and i'm not going to put myself in another situation where i will not be happy i did that before i won't do it again. I may try to come ou there but i don't know when and when i do i'll give you guys plenty of notice if you would like to get together for grubbage or somethin. You guys can email me you should have atleast one email address of mine, don't email me at work we've been having plms with our server so we're only getting about half our emails, email one of the other addresses i check them periodically throughout the day later

Re: even more s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

you're wrong dude. i am sorry to hear about it. i just wish things could have worked out between you two. honestly, remember how i said i didn't like her all that much? well, i was started to like her towards the end. i sincerely mean it when i say i'm sorry to hear about it. i'm also glad though, that the hard thing has been done. at least now you won't have to worry too much about cheating and being cheated on dude. i know you loved her to death. i can understand and relate to that. i had my loves just as you did. though, none of them lasted as long as you and she. my longest was 2.5 years, but it still hurt like a bitch to lose her.

yes, you're right, you can only be who you are. nothing more, nothing less. i can also understand about not getting into another situation like before. i'm just saying dude, don't give up on things. i know you'll find another girl. you're a cool guy.

i know you know there's plenty of places out here in las vegas to grab some grubbage. i'm going to hold you to that too.

*grin*

come on down when you want, we'll grab some beers or something, grab some food, and shoot the shit. i told ya guy, we're still friends. i don't let my friends go so easily unless they straight up tell me they no longer want to be friends. i don't hold grudges. i get upset about things, let them stew a bit, then get over them. it's my way of life and all.

as far as emailing you, i don't remember your email addresses at home. they were in my yahoo account address book. that account was shut down cause of too much spam. so i lost a lot of important stuff from that account. if you'd like to, and wouldn't mind doing it, send me all your addresses that you normally check (that aren't your work addresses) and i'll be more than happy to email you on as much of a regular basis as i can.

Re: even more s'up

[ex-peanut70.livejournal.com]

oh, forgot to add a couple of somethings. first off, LJ didn't post the original. so i'm just going to nutshell this attempt.

1) would you mind giving us your new cell number? if not, i understand. it's cool.

2) i know about the car. don't worry about it. was upset, not anymore. just too bad that it had to get towed, stupid tow people. i appreciate your trying to sell it.

let me know the cost to get it back, what date i have to get it back by, and if it's even possible to get it back. i'll try and work something out. thanks again for trying.