yeahbob

[hoveringsombrero]

so my brother isn't visiting THIS weekend but the one after this coming weekend

my mother called, and she handed the phone to my visiting grandmother and grandfather
it was awkward, i can't relate to them, they can't relate to me
i guess i take comfort in knowing they're also off put by this

i have a cousin that lives up here in fulsom (just moved here).
he and his wife are born and raised SDA, he works for a company owned by the church
my family wants me to get in contact with him.

what the hell do he and i have in common anymore. i may be eventually learning to be some sort of grown up, but normal world grown up and grown up to my family are two different things.
as long as i do things that embarrass them (hey mom, guess what i did yesterday, i printed out naked people and taped them to my walls)
and am not properly attached to the right kind of man
and am not 'in the church'
i will forever be an immature child to them

for a moment i think it bothers me
then i realize that there are a few people that are not my family that it's much more important to me that they are proud of me

but part of my brain still clings to the notion that a mother is suppose to be proud of you as long as you're happy.

at least my father likes and approves of me.

i'm going to sleep now.

Comments

[bob.livejournal.com]

I found out I have some older cousins on my mom's side I never met (family feud, sisters that hadn't talked in years). They are like 20-25, there's a few of them. None of them are cool computer or science people though.