if you don't know what i'm talking about this post isn't for you</font

[hoveringsombrero]

unless you're one of those that likes it when i'm cryptic

i know there are a couple people that have been watching for a public statement or opinion about what's happened

frankly if i'm not aware of why i cause offence or trouble, if i can't figure out what to say to fix it, and everything i say makes things worse, then how am i going to find the words for myself?

some people have told me to go away, other people have told me the fact that i've done so is the cause of the problem, some people say my words and actions are the problem, other people say my lack of words or actions are the problem

what did i win exactly? loss of someone i liked a lot

all of you that i have disappointed and hurt and offended, i just don't know what to say, i can't defend myself because i tend to agree with anything bad said about me if said by people i considered friends, i dislike arguing and will avoid it at all costs if i ever really liked or respected you

kal all but ordered me to stop hiding from irc a little bit ago, a good friend of many years has lectured me about how hiding isn't helping anything, but i can't believe it'll help anyone to have me around right now

admittedly i should leave livejournal alone if i'm truly hiding, but i can't bring myself to

*sigh*
oh well a whole lot of words to say i don't know what to say or think or do

jumper problems are easier to worry about, at least they eventually make logical sense

resume candy and ice cream entires>>>

Comments

[ex-oki86.livejournal.com]

je pense que je ne comprend rein et je ne sais pas.

But I would like to say that I would miss you a lot if you left Lj.

frankly, leaving for a time to take a break is ok, leaving to gather your thoughts and wait for the other person to calm down is ok...

But to totally try to avoid a situation is another. If you keep running, you'll only get tired. At least that's what they say... I find I tend to have strong legs. =o