dialup and stuff

well i lied, phone on sooner than tues
i picked up the phone this morning and heard a dialtone

i'm tired
i'm worried about kitten
it's small and very young
it sleeps a lot, it doesn't eat as much as i think it should
it runs sometimes
it likes to sleep ON me or kal
it yells a lot
it purrs some
it's really very sweet

i'm worried that it might be sick, but it is the runt and i think it's probably only maybe 6 or 7 weeks old
wasn't ready to leave it's momma yet but it wasn't getting taken care of by it's momma very well
it's probably better off with me

BUT if it does start acting more sick i'm going to take it to one of the local no-kill shelters, i can't afford a vet this week, at least, and it's irresponsible to keep it if i can't afford a vet if it would be better off giving it to a place that will help it
i've been terrified it's going to die and i've been crying a bit, i have a very very hard time dealing with death
i suspect part of me TRIES to stick myself in upsetting situations because i don't think i should be happy

anyway, i'm probably going to get offline and sleep a bit more after i check mail and stuff and before i get frustrated at dialup

and then ...

slept a lot
let the kitten sleep with me
worried about the kitten

i just took a shower and shaved my legs (exciting isn't it?)
i'm in the midst of a particularly heavy but not overly painful period
just tiring cramps not staby death cramps

aren't you glad i haven't had internet access the last few weeks
my life is pretty dull

kal told me of a lj gettogether at dave and busters in san jose, we were there that day(towing kal's car back to dealership) and we watched a movie at that mall then went over to D&B, didn't see anyone i recoginized and it was getting really really noisy and crowded, i thought i saw a guy that looked like apriljoy's BB as we were leaving

is nicci really dead?