(no subject)

i am home

what do dicks and popcorn have in common?

my brain is so fried
my eyes ended up being more interested in coworker's cleavage then the naked tits swinging about on screen

tired brain = no control over that part of my brain that forces eyes to nice (in person) boobies

i will make more sense after i sleep

l;dfjweofhwehnfwaoef

oh yeah, my weekends will be Monday/Tuesday
today didn't count because it was training and not even my shift
i did 5pm -1 am, when i'll normally be doing 1am - 9am

thank god i get to rest after the first, sleep deprived day

speaking of sleep,
i should try that

heh

oh yeah
there's a tip jar
i made $7.25
cause i'm cute

pleh

i should like to sleep longer but i keep coughing myself awake
i shall write a big posty about job now

JOBBY

for some reason i'm having extreme deja vu about writing this post. anyhow

the place i work is a porn THEATRE and video sale/rental (and sextoys) store
the place is really nifty looking, it's clean and pretty upscale as far as that sort of business goes. all of the co workers i've met are very nifty

i'm told my job will mostly consist of the video rental/sale and toy section, but they've got a strange rental system that i'm sure won't be so confusing when i've had proper sleep before i go in.
the movie ticket/snackbar section is overnamed the 'box office'
it's a snack bar type deal, with an old standard register, soda, candy, popcorn
to get into the theatre it's $10 and you can stay for as many movies as you like (3 -6 play a night depending on the night) women get into the theatre for free
but i'm not entirely clear on wether the woman *has* to be with a man to get in free
cause no girls have gone in alone yet, and i forgot to ask.

oh yeah, SEX PATROL if you're working in the 'box office' every half hour to an hour you must take the giant flashlight of doom, and walk down one aisle of the theatre, punch a clock on the stage, and walk back up the other aisle. while doing so check to make sure that all men have at least a seat between them and aren't touching each other, if dicks are out but it's not obvious and they're not bothering anyone, ignore it. also make sure that couples are clothed and in their seats and not making with the fucky.

it's actually called sex patrol, and you write SEX PATROL the date and your name on the card you punch for it, i found it very amusing.
there are cameras in the theatre, so you can see when you're behind the counter, who's whacking in the theatre,
it's really funny, some guys don't care, but most guys when i go on sex patrol suddenly sit up straight, put arms on back of chair or cross arms on chest and attempt to pretend they've been sitting that way the whole time.

however there was one guy - i could see from the monitor - who stayed there for like 7 hours and the whole time he was in the theatre he just sat there, arms on back of chair, all kicked back, just watching.
like it was a totally normal movie.

the theatre customers are - on the average - very nice middle aged men
they like to be smiled at and joked around with, there are quite a few regulars
even the more smarmy ones are just amusingly so

and as with all adult video/sex toy stores; most of the customers there are just nervous
sure you got your come in and rent a video every night guys, but usually there's much giggling.

as a whole it's a very nifty, friendly, clean place

and best of all!!
the more different my hair the better, tats, piercings no problem
the only rule is be clean and neat and don't look like a skank basically
cleavage is a plus >:)
the idea being that the more memorable and interesting and nice i am the more business and tips i get
=D

for some reason that fact that it's porn, makes it a job which is not 'below me'
i'm a pretentious snob and i don't wait on people and i'm worth more than $8/hr
but i've been out of the working world so long that it's not an insult
it's not min wage
and i'd rather get paid less and work at a fun place where i don't have to hide hair/tattoos than work somewhere for more and be miserable and have to pretend to look like everyone else

yikes this post got long.
i should hit that post button now
yes.

the world rejoices

kal is overjoyed that i've got a job
i think he's having more fun telling friends where i work than i am

so far nobody is surprised, go figure
heh

honestly things have been a little tense here
i was dragging my feet a bit because i didn't want to get hired somewhere i didn't like.

but i was trying, which is probably why kal did NOT kick me out on my ass ;)

oh yeah

I MAKE MORE MONEY THAN KAL!!!
also i still don't think unemployment counts as a job :P

i've never MADE more money than him before
i've HAD more money than him,
but big allowance from daddy doesn't count as a 'real' job

(no subject)

i'm a tired porn merchant
i'm going back to bed for a while

damnit!

i had just finally gotten into a nice, coughfree peaceful sleep
and kal woke me up
i'm twitchy and tense now

but he's going gamey and he had to know if i was working tonight or not
so i called to find out

after some confusion (everybody just needs to call 1am morning and it'd be less confusing)
he said you next come in tomorrow, Wednesday
i said so is that tonight or Thursday morning?

he thought was Thursday morning
then he looked at it again and yes tonight, Wednesday MORNING

i'm going to go try to find that peaceful coughfree sleep again

ok?
ok.
OK!

fewd

ok, this is driving me crazy
i need to eat
but I'M NOT HUNGRY
i'm approaching 48 hours and having eaten nothing but:

1/4th of a cheeseburger
8 crackers
juice
half of a dinner salad

i'm still really damn tired and i know it's because i'm not eating enough as well as the long stretch with no sleep

i dunno what i want but the only thing within walking distance is una mas, and i think they close soon
there's other RESTAURANTS
but i don't eat in such places alone
i'll barely eat IN a fast food restaurant alone

damnit, eating is such a hassle

moneyandstuff

i have $22

somebody should go to dinner with me
yes?
no?

shower

i'm gonna take a shower now
perhaps someone will want to come go to dinner with me when i'm out of the shower

have a picture of a naked cartoon guy showering

Pseudoephedrine Hydrocloride

i cleaned all the junk outta my wallet to make room for actual money
i found the receipt and stub from the $25 to put me on the lease at the townhouse so we could transfer here, i found the receipt and all the stubs from our rent and deposit and stuff to move in here.
heh
also i found a little fake tattoo which i decided to put between mah boobies
<--- as you can see

since nobody is taking me up on that dinner offer i think i'll go rumage thru the kitchen
maybe i'll make mushroom soop
i've been pretty sick of raman, this job couldn't have come at a better time
kitchen cupboards and fridge are pretty bare

oops

i forgot about food
and went wandering thru craig's list and ended up making an example page in response to an ad

GO EAT SOOP ERIS

i'm not lazy, i'm inventive

i went into the kitchen to make some mushrooom sooooop
i saw that the pot i usually make it in is dirty
i search through the cupboards
and my eyes light upon one of the plastic joooos bottles
so i open the can of sooop
dump it inside
fill can with hothot water,
dump it inside
put lid on
SHAKE

then i pour into green facebowl and eat wif some crackers
i am THE COOLEST ever

yay

watching the osbornes
yay for tari for reminding me

Sharon Osborne:
"martha stewart can lick my scrotum.
Do I even have a scrotum?"

biff rocks

my brother is so funny

Biff: your job rules
Biff: that is so sick its funny
Biff: I love you
Biff: lol