hi, i'm awake too early

ugh
job faire today
can we do this on no food?

ithinkicanithinkicanithinkican

i've updated/fixed my resume again and printed out 10 copies with generic cover letter and now have a stack of them all neatly paper clipped



there is question of how presentable i can look (clothes are still iffy as to where they all are) i'd like to say at least red is a tad more 'normal' but it's rather kinda faded to pinkish. i suppose still that a pink isn't as jarring as a green or blue



day two day two day two

must make my first drinky thing
i again awoke sans headache, i'm still kinda weird floaty dizzy feeling
i did get rather bitchy towards the end of the night last night, but so far so good

well then (delayed posty, computer problems before i left)

this 10.48 thing hasn't been very hard at all
i've not actually gotten hungry at all

i'm beginning to doubt that one needs food at all, really.

(did i say 'at all' enough?)

my head is clear, except for mild floaty feeling
i'm kinda tired still, but not sick feeling or any such thing
and i'm all happy and silly

mostly dressed, off to joby thing soon

i just wrote this ( to the tune of stand by rem, hehe)

Stan's in the place where you live
kick him out
forget about politeness
cause the dude keeps eating your food

Stan's in the place where you work
call security
forget about politeness
he's going to get you fired

joby thing

well i ATEFOOD
:/
food from the panda express, i am however going to continue the thing till the juice stuff is gone and not eat for the rest of the day, i figure i walked off most of the panda food anyhow

i was feeling all dizzy and lightheaded so kal insisted i eat before we went to job faire, i was all prepared to just sit there and watch him eat
there was no parking and we ended up parking at the mall (eating), then walking to the convention center. which i think is actually farther than if we'd just walked from home

(no subject)

Six o'clock - TV hour. Don't get caught in foreign
towers. Slash and burn, return, listen to yourself
churn. Locking in, uniforming, book burning, blood
letting. Every motive escalate. Automotive incinerate.
Light a candle, light a votive. Step down, step down.
Watch your heel crush, crushed, uh-oh, this means no
fear cavalier. Renegade steer clear! A tournament,
tournament, a tournament of lies. Offer me solutions,
offer me alternatives and I decline.

The other night I dreamt of knives, continental
drift divide. Mountains sit in a line, Leonard
Bernstein. Leonid Brezhnev, Lenny Bruce and Lester
Bangs. Birthday party, cheesecake, jelly bean, boom! You
symbiotic, patriotic, slam book neck, right? Right.

oh yeah

job faire itself

first i was going to make an entry about it
then i was going to tell about it in reply
did forget
so i tell in entry

it was kinda sucky, very small, too many people milling about
the people in the booths seemed needy and frantic
i handed in a couple resumes
so we shall see

(no subject)

i feel like digging my rollerblades out of the closet and roll back and forth inside the complex
i wonder if that would annoy anyone?
i dun think they're loud

(no subject)

i should like to be able to put filters on my TV
so i could watch many things in black and white

(no subject)

( EYE KEEES YOOU )

ATTACKING ALL OUTER PHYSICAL FUNCTIONS!! FOOLING ALL THE STUPIDS!! GARG! I AM SAYING GAAARG!!

i can makey the livejournal post, i can smart!

so aside from all else, i'm going to continue this large amounts of juice and water every day even when eating, and i believe i shall go one 24 hour period a week sans anything but juice and water
and did really clear my head and i felt/feel better
the bit of food i had today was the first time in a few weeks that ANY food was agreeable to my body

i must admit that i can see where not eating can become addictive, it's also nice to know that i have a person around who will force me to eat if it becomes an issue.

i still never understand how weight itself is an issue to people, i suppose i'm biased because i've always been 20lbs heavier than i look even when i was skin and bones.

i could give a shit less if i weigh in the neighborhood of 200lbs, if i LOOK 140lbs. inches people inches!

my goal is to BECOME HEALTHY and i assume that doing so will make me smaller around, happy side effect. once i get much healthier then i will concentrate on areas of me which i wish to be even smaller around

i think it would kick ass to LOOK 140lbs and BE 190+lbs, that'd mean i was solid muscle, hehehe, if that ever happened i guess i'd have to become a wrasslin girl

;)

TAO FA TSU-DAN
FIND PEACE WITH A
CONTENTED CHAO