.i'm having an attack of screw you guys i'm going home ...

i sincerely apologize to those of you that actually care, i've kinda done a blanket ignore, and QT i'll write you a long email

i've just grown weary of the struggle to keep the cams online with only a dialup and a laptop (only? :D) and i've decided that i can do without that stress at this point it seems, not really a firm decision it just kinda happened, i'm on a teetertotter, i feel bad that i'm offcam, then i notice less stress, i feel bad that i've clamed up in livejournal, then i see other journals gushing and whining, and half of the responses being insincere bullshit

i deal
i deal
i deal
i am not a wombat

the people who actually care are there, and i have people to talk to, were i "on cam" more i'd've probably been more public, mostly my problems currently are money problems and igotmyheathinsurancecutoffinthemiddleoftherapy problems, and from my point of view, TOO DAMN SMALL AND PETTY to bother other people with

so if i've ignored you it could be one of many things, the main two being

i don't give a shit and i'd've ignored you anyhow
i like you too much to bother you with things i feel shouldn't be affecting me

(we have one main weapon, fear .. fear and surprise, TWO! two main weapons, fear, surprise and badly remembered monty python quotes, THREE, three weapons ....)

never you worry, takes allot more than this to kill chaos
and besides, i'm not letting 'em lock me up unless i can take the cams ;)

mantra a la Cydniey
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.
I'm not a camgirl, I'm a girl with a cam.



say g'night gracie

.have you

ever put condoms on your feet?
it's EVER SO MUCH fun