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Random thoughts
ever look at/thought of someone and felt glad for their existence just because it was an example of what NOT to be?

it's a vicious circle

looking at someone, thinking "i'm glad i'm not like her", "i'm glad i don't do the stupid things he does", "i'm glad i don't have her habits"

little bit of smug happens

then the doubt

"shit do i sound like her!?" "holy crap, that's something HE would have done"

and you wonder if people are going to see things you do as what she/he does, and you keep quiet, "if i just don't say anything then i won't sound like him/her"

nearly everygoddamnperson in this world has ulterior or sinister motives behind everything they do, so one becomes suspicious of niceness, even if there is no need for suspicion, and one becomes afraid to show any niceness, "they'll just think i'm kissing ass like he does"

it pisses me off, and you know what it is that pisses me off? not what you'd think i'd wager

people like i've spoken of, a person perhaps despite my sometimes highandmighty me i've been at times, really don't get to me all that much, most of the time it's amusing as all hell, and the "i'm glad i'm not him/her" is most oftentimes just a subconscious thought

what pisses me off is when these thoughts do bother me, when i'm sitting reading or zenning, and letting my thoughts wander and realizing i'm thinking these things

is it arrogant as FUCK for me to think i should be above such things?

yeah probably

however that doesn't stop me from being pissed at myself when i don't live up to the stupidly high standards of who i believe i'm supposed to be

BLAH!

other people scare me
i'm glad i'm me

(no subject)

i'll tell you something (iamawolfbutiliketowearsheepsclothing)

the something
the one thing that is most fun about having odd colourd hair

yeah the blank stares and glares are amusing, often annoying,

the one something that makes it all wonderfull is these incidences

few days ago:

nadin and i walking up to wal-mart entrance .... normal looking mother/daughter coming out ... daughter about 10-11 years old ... daughter stares at me big eyed and grinning .. daughter tugs on mother's sleave ... whispers "mom mom, look red and purple hair" and points ... mother looks tired and semi disgruntled from shopped, tiredly looks indirection daughter points .. blinks at me .. sillyhappy grin grows on her face ... mother looks down and daughter and says, "wow, that's pretty neat" .. daugter nods .. mother says, "would you like red and purple hair?" ... daughter blinks up at mother ... "can i?" .... mother and daughter move out of earshot

i was grining and bouncy for quite a while, just really cool when that happens

yesterday:

kal, spanky and i were out running errands, parked in front of hollywood video, sent spanky to return videos, couple trendy-punk girls were walking past, one of them had a shirt on that i recognized but couldn't place, was craneing my neck to try to see it better, girl saw me looking, blinked, gigglebounced, grined and waved

:D

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SCREW the subject line, i can make my own


WOW, i was all sad about mexican getting his hair cut, i wanted him to keep growing it out, he just stopped by with the NEW dryer and went back out in search of a washer

and it's DAMN sexy

wow

.

wooo!

well they came back and took back the dryer and left, then came back with a washer/dryer combo!!

yay